VANUATU GOVERNMENT REMOVES IMPORT DUTY ON FIJI BISCUIT

PRIME MINISTER SAYS "MY BAD"

In a twist to the ongoing biscuit war, the Vanuatu government at midday today issued a statement to the Fiji government saying that it was removing a 50% import duty placed a few days ago on the biscuit imported from Fiji.

In a softly worded statement, the Prime Minister of Vanuatu explained that he was only trying to demonstrate the strength of Vanuatu kava so that Fiji government would refrain from placing a quota when he happened to get doped and decided to place import duty on Fiji biscuits. "My bad" the Prime Minister stated.

Reliable sources close to the Prime Minister of Vanuatu confirmed that the decision of placing a 50% import duty on Fiji biscuits was made at a kava bar in Santo, Vanuatu during the Christmas holidays. "The Prime Minister was really doped when he began his countdown and unfortunately for Fiji, he had a black out at 50% mark, otherwise the figure would have been much lower" the source confirmed.

In a tit-for-tat response, Fiji's foreign affairs minister, Honorable Kaliopate Tavola called his Vanuatu counterpart to inform him that his Prime Minister can also do the same and with a much more potent drink called "home brew". "He had it once and the excise duty on white goods in Fiji shot up" Mr. Tavola added.

Reacting to the latest decision by the Vanuatu government, the Chairman of FMF, the biscuit maker and major exporter, Mr. Hari Punja expressed joy and added that they would now be able to expand their production and buy all the biscuits from the island of Rotuma which had been placed on hold. Rotuma after years of trials had finally managed to plant biscuits and would be harvesting its first crop in early February.

In other news, assistant police spokeswoman Corporal Prashila Narayan said the government CEO who was caught driving drunk was not charged for that offence after breathalyser tests came out negative. She was instead charged with obstruction of justice and released on bail after confessing to acting as a decoy for other CEOs' on that night.